Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: Philomena (2013)

#inspirationalmovies

Continuing with my special mini-cycle dedicated to Catholicism and women, today's movie is basically a (polished up) sequel of The Magdalene Sisters. 

Philomena (2013, Stephen Frears) is based on a true story that nevertheless feels somewhat unbelievable. Well, there's reality for you. If after The Magdalene Sisters you asked yourself about the possible futures of the girls who got away from the religious institutions controlling them, here you have the story of Philomena Lee.

There's difference and nuance, though. In the eyes of the religious establishment Philomena had comitted a sin. She had sex before marriage (oh!) with someone she (apparently) barely knew (gasp!) and she liked it! Mind you, this is a very important difference between the discourse that The Magdelene Sisters present and Philomena's story. As Rose in last week's movie (in contrast of other women in that film), Philomena did actually transgress the social norms and was very unlucky to become pregnant as a consequence. And her child was taken away from her.

This is the double sword of the story. On one hand, there's actual pleasure involved. She enjoyed being with that boy. On the other hand, this very fact makes her even more vulnerable to all the injustice done to her afterwards. If your religion (and people in position to punish you) maintain that you have to repent and suffer for your sins, and you know very well that you have transgressed, the likelihood of rebellion seems to be lower.

Yet this is only a part of the story. The second drama revels when Philomena - already older and after a marriage and other children - gets help of a journalist in trying to find her son. Apart from a pretty unbelievable turn of events... Ah, go, see it! ... you get the amazing dame Judi Dench playing someone torn apart by her trauma of loss of a child and faith that's represented by the same people who treated her so badly.

An additional feature that makes the movie a treat is the clash of worlds that her interactions with the world class journalist embarked upon a human interest story lead to. These ar class difference and not gender driven, and challenge the airbrushed image of drama-worthy and interesting people. Good for you, Philomena!

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: Wadjda (2012)

#inspirationalmovies

Wadjda (2012, Haifaa Al-Mansour) is exactly what you expect when watching a well made movie telling you tales about cultures very different from the one you live in: gives you a general picture of a society while stating very clearly that it's by no means completely homogeneous. Very well. And when such a movie come from the first ever Saudi-Arabian female movie director, your feminist obligation is to go and watch!

The premise is very simple and compelling: What happens when a girl that's already struggling with quite restrictive cultural norms of her society gets a strong urge to trespass even more? Or, in other words, what happens when Wadjda, a young Saudi-Arabian girl, wants a bicycle?

So get the movie, gather all the children (and not so children) you care about and watch Wadjda with them. And if you live in a context different of that of Wadjda be prepared to answer many questions. Why is everybody against her having a bicycle? Why are all the women covering themselves in black when leaving their own spaces? Why are girls not to be friends with boys? Why can men have several wives (and abandon their wives if they are unable to give them male children)? Why are girls followed very closely by their teachers to make sure they behave in a certain way? Why girls suspected of a lesbian relationship publicly shamed? And so on... Most importantly, what is likely to happen with Wadjda when she gets older? What kind of life is she likely to lead?

It may also help to ask those questions to yourself too. Just to realize what are the things that you most likely take for granted in life.

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: Victim (1961)

#inspirationalmovies

Retaking the theme of sexual diversity in restrictive cultures (well, at least more restrictive than others), here you have a historical gem: Victim (1961, Basil Dearden). While it's about men surrounded by men and women are just part of the context that refuses to accept and embrace (see Eyes Wide Shut (2009) for a contemporary twin and A Single Man (2009) for a depiction of the same era done recently), it still adds powerfully of the narrative of consequences of criminalization of consensual sexual behaviour among adults.

The movie as such - while depicting the horrors to what anti-sodomy laws may lead - is very progressive in the generalized message and surprises with that. It was 1961, think of that.

Also, the central marriage shown illustrates the importance of communication in the couple and mutual effort to understand each other. Obvious stuff, but still very important and not as widely practiced as needed.

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: Fake Orgasm (2010)

#inspirationalmovies

Falso Orgasmo (2010) DOCUMENTAL from Hugolo on Vimeo.

While normally we do not mind spoilers (assuming that analysis = spoiler), this is an exception. Click "play" and watch this 2010 documentary on conceptual/performance artist Lazlo Pearlman. The title Fake Orgasm refers to one of his performance which included a fake orgasm competition... but that's just the beginning as he goes much farther exploring and demolishing the notions of gender, heteronormativity, gendered expectations in the bed and out of it.

If you are already familiar enough with the notion that gender binary is an anachronistic concept, this won't be that surprising, of course. But it can still give you ideas about possible work in bringing this message to other (unsuspecting) people and breaking down the cages that social constructs like this may be for people.  

There are some moments of Spanish spoken with no translation in this version, but you should be able to manage through it. All the crucial narrative is in English.

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: Tomboy (2011)

#inspirationalmovies

It may be very difficult for older people to admit, but the life of young - and very young - can be extremely complex. Classical literature is full of examples, but today's one is a recent French cinema gem.

Tomboy (2011, Céline Sciamma) offers a moving story about trying to fit in better in your own body while living in an extremely gendered world.

It will (well, it could, if you'll let it) get you thinking about:
- How little external appearance tells you about people. And how - at the same time - you should respect the signals people are sending. Even if that takes you into an uncharted territory (even beyond gender binary, uh oh).
- How much inner drama and struggle is brought up when you realize that you should make serious adjustments in order to fit in. Especially if you feel that you cannot share that with anybody. Especially if people assume that you are too young to have any coherent idea about what's going on.
- How beyond the "oh, children are so cruel" stands nothing more than the boxed thinking of the adults transmitting certain notions. You cannot expect little children - those people still just ordering basic ideas about human life - to question and bend the old toxic ideas right away. Adults should lead by example.

It's bittersweet, short, and very touching. What else do you need?

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: Gay men in homophobic cultures

#inspirationalmovies

While these are not an obvious part of our repertoire, they still make sense to be watched from a feminist and I Being a Girl perspective. Even though cis-men are at the center of these movies, and women is only a backdrop for their drama and passion, it still emanates from no other place than patriarchy and the obsession with controlling the sexual and amorous lives of people.

So, today's offer is two movies that look into the lives of gay men in culturally very restrictive contexts: A Single Man (2009, Tom Ford) and Eyes Wide Open (2009, Haim Tabakman). Set in two very different but undoubtedly socially controlling places - 1960's USA and nowadays Israel among the Orthodox Jews - both of them tell the dramatic tale of how even male privilege won't save you if you transgress the code of sexual morality.

Of, course there are differences. The aesthetics, trying to be true to time and place depicted, are very different. Eyes Wide Open adds a religious restriction where A Single Man deals with a more secular type of institutionalized homophobia. It is loss of a loved one when you are not really allowed to mourn vs. the discovery of lust where it's strictly forbidden and harshly punished. Nevertheless, the main theme is the social pressure to negate ones real desires and feelings in order to keep up with what's esteemed to be proper and moral. And what that does to people.

One of the lesbian versions of the same story would be Fire (1996, Deepa Mehta), already covered before here. 

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: HIV/AIDS in the big cinema

#inspirational movies 

Putting this under "inspirational" may be somewhat questionable. Movies that have HIV/AIDS as their central theme are not even expected to be inspirational (or uplifting). But in the light of the recent incomer into the genre - Dallas Buyers Club (2013, Jean-Marc Vallée) - a little, very critical round-up seems adequate. And all of those movies touch the activism theme, so they are relevant anyways.

While our all-time favorite still is Rent (2005), these do have some attractive points to it (and downsides too, unfortunately). Curiously enough, there's a decade between the release dates for all three while there are set pretty much around the same time, mid-eighties up to early nineties:

Philadelphia (1993, Jonathan Demme), the ultimate HIV/AIDS classic on the legal battle against discrimination. Has quite some real life inspiration.

Lessons learned: (a) privilege does not protect you from HIV, and (b) homophobia can be cured dealt with if empathy kicks in and if close contact / familiarity is established.

Lacks in the department of: women. Only at the background, and the whole battle for rights is fought among privileged men.

Angels in America (2003, Mike Nichols), the we-are-all-connected esoteric epic on sexuality, coupledome, love, and HIV.

Lessons learned: (a) privilege does not protect you from HIV, and (b) HIV affects also those that are themselves sero-negative but with their lives inter-weaved in those of PLWHA, an obvious truth, but beautifully depicted. Also, (c) you cannot pray away homosexuality. Nor mental health issues.

Lacks in the department of: spirituality. All the angels, prophets, ghosts thing goes from whimsical to annoying to just crazy at times.

Dallas Buyers Club (2013, Jean-Marc Vallée), the quite shitty movie with a pseudo-alternative HIV/AIDS narrative that just got 3 Oscars. Also inspired by an actual person. Caused a major stirring not only because of the overall sexism of the movie but because of Jared Leto - a cis-male - being cast to play a trans person, and about how he does that. 

Lessons learned: (a) heterosexuality (and homophobia) will not protect you from HIV, (b) homophobia is not cured dealt with just by lose contact / familiarity if no empathy can be activated, (c) the big pharma says is not always in your best interest, (d) traditional masculinites are bad for your health.

Lacks in the department of: women. Only at the background, and the whole battle for rights is fought among men. Women are the angry but passive doctor, nurses, and random people that men have sex with.

Other movies that we have talked about before where HIV drives some part of the plot are Kids (1995) and The Hours (2002).

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: Stonewall (1995)

#inspirationalmovies

For a little walk in (again, a dramatized one) history, we offer Stonewall (1995, Nigel Finch). While it has 1990's written all over and sometimes makes you cringe because of awkwardness, it's still worth the while.

Playing with the idea that every LGBTQI activist has their own Stonewall story (yes, yes, go, read the wiki, we'll wait), so here you have one particular story with all the dramatic ingredients and dichotomies you wanted. Being out / being in closet. Trying to fit in / defying. Creating closed ghettos / suffering discrimination. Different ways of doing activism. Love. Friendship. Corrupt policemen. Street riots. Some jail. Lots of the Shangri-Las and lip-sync. Reminder that the most famous LGBTQI riot (and historical milestone) was fought by trans persons of color and not well-groomed rich white men.
Don't expect much from this, and you might be surprised.

 

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: La vie d'Adèle (2013)

#inspirationalmovies

La vie d'Adèle or Blue is the Warmest Color (2013, Abdellatif Kechiche) is a heavy romantic French drama, a very good example of cinematic depiction of the realities of making and unmaking affective relationships. And being French, it's explicitly sexual (take care of this, think twice before watching this with your grandma...), full of intense emotions, intimate details, ups and downs characteristics of the life in couple.

The twist away from the typical emotionally charged romantic drama is the fact that the central couple is made of two young women. Therefore, the already existing tension of desire, negotiations, jealousy, changing feelings is accompanied with additional pain caused by coming out, stigma, construction of an alternative identity and other little gifts that the heteronormative patriarchy brings.

Go, block 3 hours (!) of your busy schedule to immerse yourself in what is already becoming a classic of LGBTQI movies. And then feel free to read some of the analysis already done on the possible bias introduced by the male gaze and stereotyping, etc. Some people think it's more of the same old eroticizing for hetero audiences, some claim it as a step out of this girls just playing dogma... Go, make up your mind.

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: The Hours (2002)

#inspirationalmovies

The Hours (2002, Stephen Daldry) reflects the inner life of three very different women - one of the being Virginia Woolf - connected by Woolf's novel Mrs. Dalloway (1925). Based on Michael Cunnigham's eponymous novel, the plot revolves around the fragile nature of happiness and how, even when satisfaction is expected, is does not always come.

Other recurrent themes are the complexities of affective relationships (love is complex, you know), sexual orientation and ways to canalize it (especially in oppressive setting), femininity and gender roles.

Of course, the three lead actresses - Nicole Kidman, Meryl Streep and Julianne Moore - add value to the picture. Also, pay attention to the colours and to the beautiful, stream-like pace of the movie

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975)

#inspirationalmovies

OK, this is cult. This is scandalous. This is classic. If you haven't seen The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975, Jim Sharman), drop everything and get a copy!

If you thought that Shortbus (antother must movie for people in SRHR, mind you) was outrageous, this is even better. No graphic sex but an even more whimsical take on sex and sexuality. Gender fluidity, happily (pleasurably!) lost virginities, ditching the monogamy... all that in 1975 and in drag!

In case you saw The Perks of Being a Wallflower and didn't really get the performance part, this movie is what they were mimicking. Being part of the fandom, obviously.

+ The soundtrack is the best. Here, have a taste!

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: Mean Girls (2004)

#inspirationalmovies

This, as some other of our suggestions - like Dirty Dancing (1987), for example - may seem unlikely to be labelled as feminist inspiration.

But we insist that Mean Girls (2004, Mark Waters), the girl-on-girl hate classics for those who have grown up in the 2000's, does offer at least some empowering life lessons:

a) You do not need men to perpetuate the patriarchy. The whole thing - as heteronormative and fallocentric as it gets - can be going on with the objects of the rat race being completely oblivious to the fact that friendships, sanity and intelligence is sacrificed for entering in a couple.

b) Playing dumb (or different) is a strategy that doesn't work in long term. And it hurts your most authentic self. Not worth it.

c) The urge to be part of a group, to have social capital is a (social) life or death issue among adolescents (it may get better with the age, not always, though). Trying to be cool is hard enough... and bullying exists, especially the body-, gender- and sexual orientation-related one. And it takes a lot to try to get over that and hope on that it gets better.
This is to be taken into account when trying to intervene and change the behaviour. 

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: Easy A (2010)

#InspirationalMovies #Virginities

Well, this is tricky. A US-made fake-virginities and slut-shaming movie with actors much older than they should have been... Nevertheless, we still recommend you watch Easy A (2010, Will Gluck).

It won't give you any answers but might serve to start to talk about the meaning of virginities and the I'm-not-a-prude-but-not-a-slut-either paradox, about rumors and LGBTQI bullying, about the roles that parents and friends should have in our lives, about sex work, about the counseling services available, the hard-core morality (anti-choice, broadly seen) groups... almost all of the (youth) sex-related issues present in our daily life and discussions.

Use this a conversation starter with yourself or your youth group. Easily digestible and mainstream while packed with ideas for discussion.

A big + for the movie - although slightly out of the believable age group - is the amazing Emma Stone.

Sunday is for horizons: Makers (2013)

#Feminism #MakersChat #InspirationalMovies

Again, a #SundayIsForHorizons slightly out of what it was conceived to be. Perfect and extremely educational, though. The three-hour PBS documentary Makers: Women Who Make America (2013) is a very well done account of the history of feminism and empowerment of women during the second half of the 20th century.

While there is some (rightful) criticism regarding the portrayal of the current movements among women and feminisms, this is a very solid work of documentation on how the feminism (the second wave, that is to say) we know as such started. Even if you are not that into women studies. Even if you are not that into the history of the U.S. Even if you don't identify as a feminist (ouch!)... these are things every person to some extent involved in the social movements, social justice, and living in a society should know this story of empowerment and enormous (although not as big as hoped for) success.

And while not a feature film as #InspirationalMovies tend to be, still full of very real testimonies and able to push for change (even if those are baby-steps and very basic awareness raising).

+ The greatest thing is that you can streamline it for free right now! All three episodes.
Go! Take notes and expand your role model list. And your reading list. Revolutionize your own life. Build a movement.

Sunday is for Horizons: Middlesex (2002)

This time the subject of suggestion for widening of the horizons is a novel of herself and not an author.
While the author - Jeffrey Eugenides - is brilliant and outstanding, Middlesex (2002) is a masterpiece not only because of its literary depth but also because of the anthropological interest for everybody passionate about questions of gender and socialization into one, customs and morality, and their malleability.

Middlesex is the perfect combination of a coming-of-age story and a family saga. Imagine all the confusion and pain growing-up being a third-generation immigrant in the stagnating US of late XX century when a conflicting sexual/gender identity is piled onto that. Eugenides is perfectly compassionate and loves his characters, therefore the depiction of sexualities are very decent and have been praised for their humanity/veracity (and no looking-for-a-shocker to be found here). People stories, you know. Family secrets. First loves. becoming yourself.

If you need any more persuasion, well, it won a Pulitzer, too.

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: the Deepa Mehta elements trilogy

#InspirationalMovie

Director Deepa Mehta is one of our hero(ine)s. And her elements trilogy covers many of the themes we are deeply interested in. The XX century and how modernization has changed the ways we look at love, marriage, and tradition. The emancipation of women, and clashes with people who didn't think it was a good idea. The pain and exclusion, and also deep satisfaction that following your heart may bring...

Water (2005) takes us to the India of 1930's and deep into the restrictions that patriarchy imposes on women, widows in this case. The conundrum of arranged (child) marriage, women becoming possessions of their husbands, and then completely marginalized in case of the death of the husband... changed by the innocence of a child that hasn't assumed the tradition yet.

Earth (1998) takes us to the partition of India (1940's), a moment of religious and political violence where love finds it hard to survive in it's clashes with political and traditional loyalties.

Fire (1996), set later on in the XX century, reminds that marriage can still be arranged and that forms of acceptable love are still dictated by the tradition and the law, including some of them and excluding other ones. 

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: The Perks of Being a Wallflower (2012)

#InspirationalMovies

Let's forget the princesses for a while and move back to the real world. Well, as real as a Hollywod-made story about US high schools can get.

We suggest you watch The Perks of Being a Wallflower (2012, Stephen Chboski). Not only to be treated compassionately and seriously while being a young person (this is not that often, eh)... and entertain yourself with a very nice coming of age story.

Also to remind ourselves that the link macro (policies, law, culture, etc.) and micro (what people go through because of who they are and because of how other are) are very intimately linked. And over all of it, how we need to be with our people who support us in order to grow.

What are Sexual Rights about?

#IPPF #SRHR 

Hello, hello, happy 2013!

Let's be (more) serious this year. Let's be active. Let's be vocal. Let's be brave and angry. And let's start the year with going back to the basics.
So what are Sexual Rights and how do we make sure the people responsible to protect and ensure them actually do so?!

The one video up there is a very short and emotional introduction on what are we talking about.

And a longer version below spells out the Sexual Rights: An IPPF Declaration, step by step.

 

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: Whole New Thing (2005)

#inspirationalmovie

This week's feature is the sweetest coming of age story. Whole New Thing (2005, Amnon Buchbinder) tells the shock of somebody body and sex positive, somebody who has received a comprehensive sexuality education and is not constrained by rigid gender roles suddenly clashing with the real world. And dealing with it.

You get a love story, a closeted gay thriller, a rite of passage... all of it, covered with Canadian snow and a cute hippie vibe. You'll laugh and cry. We promise.

Friday is the (Inspirational) Movie Night: Rent (2005)

#inspirational movies 

While marking a World AIDS Day in the calendar again tomorrow, putting your red ribbon on (though we hope you raise HIV/AIDS awareness all the other days of the year too) and going to do some activism...

We suggest you combine the useful with the entertaining and turn to Rent (2005) for this week's inspiration. This is a screen version of a ground-breaking Broadway musical, adaptation of the Giacomo Puccini's opera La bohème, that was the first musical that was explicitly - and in a normalizing way - featuring bisexuality, homosexuality, transsexuality, sex work, the urbane HIV/AIDS crisis, drug use... not your classical fluffy musical!

On the other hand, it's still very scenic, very melodic, very romantic, very musical, really, and, yes, inspirational too.

And reminding that HIV/AIDS is not what it once was provided that you have access to treatment.